Life's big changes

posted by Jeff | Friday, May 9, 2008, 12:33 AM | comments: 1

There are a lot of points in your life that you experience radical change. Some of these, marriage and child birth in particular, can change your life in very permanent ways. And for some people, these changes happen later than for others.

I got an e-mail message from my dear friend Maureen today (who I'm sure some of you know from the old PKI days), and she's having a baby! Mind you, she just remarried last year, and now she says she'll be "doing my part to bring more sassy redheads into this world!" I used to have the worst crush on her, even though neither one of us have ever been single in the time we've known each other.

But you know, seeing her get on with life and fully taking advantage of her second big set of life changes makes me smile. When you look at how things turned out, even the bumpy parts of life don't seem like that big of a deal. In fact, what's the rush?

Diana and I met almost a year ago, and we've both had very interesting journeys in our personal and professional lives. Staggering as it is to think about, I'm sure that things will continue to change and go in unexpected directions. When I stop and take stock in that, honestly, I don't think I'd have it any other way. That's a far cry from the way my brain was wired five years ago.

Sometimes you need the right perspective to see it that way. I have two friends from college (sorority sisters, coincidentally) who both have kids and husbands and routine and, the way I understand it, very little adventure in their lives outside of their kids. There's nothing wrong with that, but I just can't imagine having that life, with kids that are 10+ years by now. I'm not confident that I could have reached the point in life I'm at right now had I taken that path.

And honestly, I don't even think the kids are the thing that "age" you. One of my best friends has always managed to have a life and be a dad, and have a winding career path. But I think most people do get into the heavy nesting mode of life early on. I wonder if that makes them more prone to a mid-life crisis later on?

So the point here is not to criticize or say that any particular lifestyle is better than another, but I'm very glad that for me at least I've been able to do in the direction I have. It hasn't been easy, and some of it was painful, but I'm really happy with the way it all turned out. The adventures of the next year promise to be even more exciting!


Comments

Rob Willi

May 9, 2008, 1:43 PM #

I maintain that my path is what lead me to where I'm at now, including my screwups. To regret any of it would make me sorry for where I'm at now. So I don't regret the path I took. I will say though that my advice from my experience is to take your time and have fun. While we are already popping out kids we will always get our season passes to parks and we will always camp. Those are the things Cindy and I did before getting married. Otherwise, why in the hell are we doing all this and not having fun while taking this path?

Good luck on everything!


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