Diana and I finally got out last night, without Simon. It's the first time in the five months we've been here, and that sucks. We did go out one night while in North Carolina visiting my in-laws, but under the circumstances (namely the car crash), I can't say that it was much of an escape. Not that I didn't have a good time, but my head wasn't in it.
Diana has been screening and searching for babysitters, and found a couple that we feel like we can trust. What sucks about this is that it's not free. We're really missing our network back on Seattle's east side.
In any case, we did dinner and a movie. Honestly, we go out to eat all of the time with Simon, but it's hard to talk about us and connect when you have a toddler who demands your attention. We love to take him everywhere, but we've become aware of how hard it is to really focus on our relationship. I've been in that disconnect scenario before, and I don't want to go there again.
Checking in is essential. We both get overwhelmed in our own worlds, to some degree. For me, it's work and my role as household accountant, for Diana it's nearly everything Simon and house related. I think we appreciate the scope of each others' responsibility, but we don't always appreciate how much it can wear on us. That's why the check-in is so important.
One night out certainly isn't enough, but at least we got to thinking about ways we can prioritize "us" a bit more. I can only imagine how hard it is for couples who really have to work hard at it to begin with.
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