I've gotta tell you, this has been one of the weirdest weekends I've had in a very long time.
Saturday afternoon was just horrible. As much as I tried to prepare myself for Luna's passing, it was traumatizing when it was actually done. I've been replaying those fifteen minutes in my head over and over again. I think it will take awhile before I can adjust and make my most common memories about her better moments.
Cosmo knows she's gone. The irony is that she acted indifferent about her for the last five years. But now, she won't leave my side. I know part of it is just that she feels my pain, because she's always been one to "watch" me when I'm down. But she seems almost in a panicked state, like something just isn't right. I know how she feels, because it was weird to come home and be greeted by only one cat.
I'm thankful that Catherine was here to help me through this. I'll be honest though, that I worried she'd make the situation even more emotional for me because, well, we've been broken up for two months and haven't really seen each other much since. I thought it might be weird, but it wasn't, and that in itself is weird. We really can be friends, and it's OK. We just can't be "those" friends. My gift and my curse is that I can't harbor anger or resentment toward the former romantic partners in my life.
Cath was all about seeing the Cavs Saturday night, and I'm glad she got me out of the house. The Luna thing would've been even more intense I think if I sat around wallowing in my misery. And hey, they actually won for a change.
It was good to see Cosmo the dog, too. As much as I wanted to not like that snorty, farty, ugly dog, I can't get enough of her.
Today I went to Erie, PA for a date. Yeah, I know, that's pretty fucking weird. Let me just tell you that the online dating thing thus far has been a pretty horrible experience. Lots of crazy people and liars.
A couple of weekends ago, eHarmony had a free trial weekend. They already roped me in the week before, as they had a three-months-for-one deal around Valentine's Day. So this nice woman Tricia did the whole "guided communication" dance with me, and she sent a message saying she was on the trial, so we started to chat and e-mail outside of the system. Then came phone calls, and I figured she was someone I wanted to meet.
I had a good time. We had Japanese food, and shot some pool. She's very sweet, and I don't feel like she has any deal-breaking hidden secrets. It'll be interesting to see where this one goes.
Speaking of strange dates, or not, I met an interior decorator last Thursday. I originally met her online too, but she declined interest because I looked too much like her ex. Well, we did some talking anyway, and she's helping me with my flooring replacement. Now that Luna is gone, I can realistically replace my carpeting and such. I'm thinking about doing bamboo for my living room. We'll see.
Strange, strange weekend...
"Lots of crazy people and liars."
After I got divorced in '94 I took a similar route with "voice mail" dating.
Crazy is too nice of a word. One woman told me she was 25, 5'4", around 130 pounds, and worked as a retail manager. When I met her, she was closer to 40 (I was 30 at the time) almost 6 foot tall, and could have played linebacker. Her retail management job was supervising the cleaning crew at the local Big Lots. None of these things made her a bad person at all, but telling me she looked like Kelly Martin and looking more like Peyton Manning is way over the top.
I did meet some great women, even dated a few of them more than once. I saw it as a numbers game. Eventually you will find someone you enjoy being with that enjoys you as well.
I met my wife online, but not through a dating service, or even while looking for someone.
I was online and got an IM asking me "What kind of problems do you solve?" It turns out my profile said I was a professional problem solver. Over the next several weeks we conversed via IM and the telephone, eventually meeting on a fateful Saturday at the beach (we lived in Florida at the time).