The pregnancy continues to mess with Diana with all kinds of bloating, pressure and discomfort, which continues to scare me. Last night, she was bleeding a little and it really freaked her out, which in turn freaked me out and led to a sleepless night for both of us. I was already mentally preparing for the worst at that point. It wasn't exactly a great day to begin with, and the whole house thing was causing a great deal of stress.
The doctor got her in this morning and we had a seriously thorough ultrasound with a tech and a med student observing. They had to do it vaginally again because it's still too early to do one externally. This was intense because even at seven weeks, you can see a heartbeat, so at nine and a half, we'd know almost immediately if something went wrong.
And within seconds, there it was. The tiny little blob had grown into a slightly bigger blob with nubs for arms and legs, and an enormous melon that was clearly drawn from my genes. And at the center of it all, a heartbeat going 144 bpm. It was at this point that we both breathed a sigh of relief, and for me at least, it all go a lot more real that there was something starting to resume a human, my child in there.
The tech took about 30 shots to pass off to a radiologist, and in doing so was telling the med student about all of the things she looks for, none of which were there except for what may be a small fibroid. They're harmless most of the time. The doctor was concerned about the bleeding but said everything seemed OK otherwise. Diana also mentioned her previous three hernia surgeries, which the doc really didn't want to hear. (By the way, she looks a little like the actress that plays Chloe in 24, in that "sexy ugly" kind of way.)
I've been trying very hard to be the strong and rational one, particularly as the hormones are taking her all over the place, but I'm starting to reach my limits. This, the house, the lack of work, etc., are all starting to wear on me pretty heavily. Outside of the house thing, I'm not even particularly stressed about money, but I feel like I'm going to break sooner than later. I feel like ever since we got off the plane from Hawaii, we've been living in a shit storm, save for the conception.
After the doctor and some comfort food at the Winking Lizard, we came home, watched a little Animal Planet in bed, and took long naps. I feel a lot better. Hopefully this is the last serious speed bump on the way to delivery.
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