God bless the child that's got his own

posted by Jeff | Wednesday, March 19, 2008, 2:03 PM | comments: 1

We had a little lunch get together today for one of the guys who is going to be a daddy any minute now. What a crazy thing that has to be... knowing your entire world is going to change drastically just like that.

I was sitting off in the corner and had one of those disconnected movie moments. You know, where all the chatter kind of silences in your head and you see the subject of the scene smiling and talking in slow motion? You start to feel kind of isolated even in a room full of people.

I'll be 35 in July, so I'm not exactly and old man. Diana is 38, and she's not an old woman either. I'm not suggesting anything (yet ;)) about us getting married, but obviously we're on the kind of relationship tract to arrive at that point. And it makes me wonder what it would be like to have a child. We both feel like we're still transient, not exactly ready for parenthood because X, Y and Z aren't in place.

Of course, most parents will tell you it's never the right time, and you either want to have kid(s) or you don't. That's probably true. It's just that, in today's world, if we really fuck up something or make some major career change, us grown ups have no real issue. We can roll. When a little person is in the picture, that changes dramatically.

There's a part of me who knows I'd be a great dad. When I look at the various volleyball kids I've had, I had real impact on some of them, only it was such a short-term thing, two or three years at most. They in turn had dramatic impact on me. It's a fascinating dynamic. I can't even imagine what it'd be like over the course of 20 years.

Who knows... maybe that's the great accomplishment in life I've been waiting to make.


Comments

CPLady

March 19, 2008, 6:37 PM #

Of course, most parents will tell you it's never the right time, and you either want to have kid(s) or you don't.

ROTFL! Took the words out of my mouth.

But seriously, even that isn't as simple as it sounds. You and I both know someone who wasn't exactly ready for kids, wasn't quite prepared, but ended up jumping into it anyway and suddenly he's on his way to a second one. I also know people who thought they were ready and in the end are struggling.

From what little I know of you personally, I think you'd enjoy being a father, although I totally understand the X, Y, and Z thing. These days, it's not so unusual to wait longer to settle down and have kids and it's certainly nothing to rush into because of age.

But even if you opt not to have those of your own, you might consider being a mentor. I think you'd really dig it.


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