I famously declared in my first year of parenthood that having a child may in fact change you, but that the change tends to be more additive than transformative. Among my friends who I knew pre-parenthood, I would probably generalize that most haven't changed, exactly, but they're definitely more than they were. Does that difference make sense?
Simon had his 11-year doctor visit, and yeah, he's at the age for the HPV vaccine, which is crazy. Shots aside, he's generally pretty healthy, but a little high in weight percentiles, because aren't we all right now. Of course this makes me contemplative of those early visits, not to mention the ER trip when he dislocated his elbow (and the face he made when the doctor popped it back in). But how did I develop?
Obviously, I learned I had to just roll with all the shit, literally and figuratively. I don't even think this is related to the autism or ADHD challenges, because early on, kids barf, they're hungry when they just ate and even though they have few opinions, they also have no fucks about your schedule or needs. I can't think of anything in my life more chaotic and unpredictable, whether it be the typical teenage experience, buying a house or even getting divorced. Kids force you to adapt, because you don't have another option.
So here's to giving in to chaos, losing control and not trying to manage everything. Life is definitely easier this way.