We met up with a friend and his wife today for dinner. Haven't seen them since the fall, so it was nice to catch up. This particular friend has been the target of a lot of my advice over the years, in terms of education, career and relationships. I won't take credit for his success, because he ultimately had to make his own decisions, but it's still interesting that following my advice generally had good outcomes.
I've been the armchair therapist and advice giver for a great many friends since college. As I've said before, it always seems obvious to me how everyone else can improve their lives and do it right. In fact, time has shown that I'm typically right with the advice I give. I know how masturbatory that sounds, and it would be if it weren't for the realization that I don't follow my own advice at all.
If I learned anything from counselor training, friends in psychology and my former therapist, it's that listening can generate all kinds of decision trees that lead you to the underlying reasons that a person feels a certain way or does certain things. I've always had a good ear for this. But it's a completely horrifying reality that I can't listen to myself.
If I'm really coming clean, I would tell you that I'm too scared to even write my advice to myself here, because I'm too scared to be that honest with myself, not to mention make it so real that I would be a coward not to follow that advice. I've managed to get most areas of my life in order, but the parts that I still need to improve on have obvious required actions that I'm too fearful to take. What I really need is a me who isn't me. Maybe a dual personality would come in handy here. The hobbitses are our friends!
I think I've just described myself as a political talk radio host, but that's OK. It's all about the self-awareness.
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