Sunday night brain dump of unrelated things...
Friday night, when Diana and I went to Melt, I felt strangely into being around the pierced and tattooed crowed that worked there. Not everyone does it right, but there's a segment who really treat body art as something sacred (no prison tattoos or me-too eyebrow rings). I don't know where I get that interest. I suppose it could be from Stephanie, but isn't it strange that I never pierced anything until after we separated? I guess it connects with my never-will-own-a-suit ethos or something. I identify with that component of it. I really miss my industrial.
This has been a pretty intense month for me emotionally, and I'm trying to really wrap my head around the causes. Is it because for the most part you associate the holidays with a certain amount of comfort and joy growing up, only to have that disrupted continuously in adulthood? I don't think I'm alone in feeling that the season that is supposed to be about celebration and joy brings up intense feelings of loss.
This year I'm incredibly thankful for having Diana with me. She's a total Christmas freak. We listened to Christmas music all weekend while she baked cookies. She set up a small tree for me. The little glow of the "candle" in the angel's hands gives me a feeling of warmth that I haven't felt in awhile. It comes with the realization that the person who gives you companionship is a constant source of inspiration and love. That's what it's really about, and I hope everyone has a person in their life who offers that.
Life is really about finding peace, that's for sure. Just as we need bad things to appreciate good things, perhaps a little chaos this time of year helps us really know what peace is.