Last night, we saw Kristin Key do a set here in Orlando (Instagram, YouTube). If you are unfamiliar with her comedy, a lot of it revolves around lesbian culture, stereotypes and such, and it is absolutely hilarious (this is a great story). Late in her act, she starts to take questions, and comes up with some of the most hilarious stuff, spontaneously, and she posts these clips online. So good.
As you can imagine, coming to Florida in the midst of the bizarre war on... sidewalk rainbows, there is some comedy there. But toward the end, she got a little serious, and expressed the sentiment that one of the most effective things that you can do is exercise what she called "joyful defiance." I like that.
Algorithms and cable news reinforce rage and anger, because it keeps you plugged into them. The "side" that seems to be against anyone who does not fit in their box of faux-normalcy wants to marginalize and shut down. But what if, despite the buckets of haterade, those being targeted are in fact exercising joy? Sure, it has the side effect of pissing them off, but it also means that at some level, the outcomes they're after are not achieved.
I know that a lot of my friends are struggling right now. It's not a great feeling to be treated as though you don't belong, don't deserve equal treatment and seemingly aren't valued as a human being. I'm not going to say that I don't know how we got here, because I do, but the disappointment in that part of the population that allows or advocates for this marginalization is heavy. But the old adage that you can't take certain things away from people may be applicable here when it comes to joy.
Last night was joyful. I've definitely never been in a room with that many lesbians, but like any group that leans queer (see also: countless coaster enthusiast events), there was joy, high-fives, hugs and a lot of shared experiences and empathy. Honestly, I never experienced that much love in church, where allegedly you're supposed to be about love. It felt about as opposite as possible to the world online, or a congressional hearing.
We can't lose our joy. I've never understood where the energy comes from to sustain hate, but joy is energetic. We need more of that, please.
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