Not purging to my blog enough

posted by Jeff | Thursday, February 12, 2009, 10:13 PM | comments: 0

Man, I realize that I haven't really blogited up the mounting things in my head lately. This is an uncharacteristically slow month for me in terms of purging to these hallowed bits. I have some theories about the reason for that.

I wrote a big long paragraph about what I thought it might partly be as it related to a previous failed relationship, but I kind of dialed it back. It just doesn't feel like something to share. Suffice it to say that I'll probably have the fear that what I have today may not last stuck in me for awhile. It's not like a crippling fear that I think about constantly, but you know, something that you can't entirely ignore when you're about to get married either.

I also have anxiety about the Diana house situation. That's undoubtedly wasted energy because there isn't anything I can do about it.

But the other thing affecting my blogquency is the level of engagement my brain has had lately at work. A lot of my job (when things are going the way I'd like) is thinking about how to solve really big problems. That's probably a good thing because it keeps me from dwelling on the above issues. It's interesting how I find it so easy to drive process for others, but find it so difficult to do for myself.

Then there's the thing about how frankly we just haven't been doing a ton of stuff. I mean, we got to see Schuyler last week (best night of my life, as certain people would say), but it's odd that we haven't traveled since November, and won't until April! Well, I'm going to Vegas next month for a conference, but that's solo. We're pretty buckled down being homebodies. I'm not complaining though. That honeymoon is going to be nuts.

Hopefully I'll be inspired to write more. It doesn't feel right to not be writing about shit I know nothing about!


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