I've stated that I begrudgingly would like to feel some validation now and then. I used to crave it in certain ways, but in adulthood I mostly just expect to never get it. I've had a lot of therapy to understand where validation should fit in my life, where it should reasonably come from, and how to move on when I haven't had it. I weirdly believe that I don't need it, but I kind of deserve it. A well-adjusted adult who is not a sociopath, and exercises humility, does not generally seek or feel entitled to validation, but maybe my damage is that I need it anyway.
Today I got it, and I don't know what to do with it. In leadership roles, I'm quick to defer recognition to others, because I know that's what the best leaders that I've known do. But doing that, it seems like it should be a cascading thing, and I'm in the middle. I'm just so used to shitty situations where I wonder if it's my personality or something else that keeps me from that loop.
Like a lot of things, I'm overthinking it. Still, it's a little upsetting that I'm so not used to it that my natural reaction is to wonder why I don't hear it more.
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