When we last met our now-teen hero, he was finishing up a year at what turned out to be a kinda shitty private school. Our decision to yank him was more than justified when almost the entire staff of that school bailed after the end of the year. To recap, the school was intended to cater to kids with learning differences, i.e., neurodivergent kids. It was a great move for him socially, but a disaster academically. The school held no regard for accountability, only accommodation, which amounted to success by showing up. While we did "save" him the inevitable struggle and anonymity of an over-crowded middle school, I think he had few opportunities to learn to learn.
The stars aligned, and a relief middle school opened near us, while his former elementary principal took over at the relieved middle school. With that leadership in mind, combined with the knowledge that ESE services and electives are not funded well at new buildings, we were able to get him transferred to the relieved school, with a few familiar faces looking out for him.
The pre-game started out pretty well, and he got to see the school and walk through his schedule before the year started. Being able to take AV Arts (TV production) also seemed like a win. The first few weeks, it was a lot, and we were again in the rhythm of struggling with actual homework. Then we had a hurricane. I was happy to have him back in a public system though, which I really believe is the foundation of our society. I also got reacquainted with things like teachers, in the 3rd lowest paying state, barely have enough dry erase markers without help from parents, and that's infuriating in a state where we waste so much money on political nonsense.
His teachers were generally pretty solid this year, helping him out, but not giving him a pass every time he got frustrated or couldn't focus long enough to complete the work. Sometimes he also got help with homework after school in the YMCA program. There may have been some situations where he wasn't getting pulled out for some of the things in his IEP, but mostly I felt like he was well-supported. The harder thing was getting support at home, because getting things done was a daily struggle, especially when it had to compete against screens. I don't think we managed that very well.
His AV Arts teacher also got canned in the middle of the year, which is not surprising given what Simon described to me. That's unfortunate, because when I had him along on one of my documentary shoots, he seemed into it.
Socially, this year was heartbreaking. He went from having a best friend to not really even vaguely having a tribe. He's been bullied. He's a lonely kid. Most of the neighborhood kids were never particularly kind to him either, so the closest thing that he has to friends are really us. I hate it. And I hate it because that was me at that age, and I know how it feels. I'm still resentful and sad about it, but I don't know how to protect him from that.
But his voice is changing, he has crushes, and he's starting to show interest in eventually having a teenager job, which is surprising at this age. He's got another year at the middle school, then he'll go to the new high school near us. These will undoubtedly be some difficult years. What I see, when he can engage, is a lot of intelligence, but it seems difficult to reach it sometimes.
For now though, it's time for summer. That means travel, water parks, mini-golf and fun stuff.
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