When I got done brushing my teeth last night, I looked in the mirror and thought, "Shit, I look tired." Not like, I got up early and it was a long day tired, but like, the world and your circumstances are wearing you down tired.
Our whole family unit has been like that lately. Poor Simon is a victim of this, and source of it as well. He did a pretty good job rolling with the jet lag and such in Orlando, not to mention our touristy desires and theme parks, but then he got sick when we got back to Seattle. Then I did, then Diana did. He's still not on a normal schedule, some days taking two naps instead of three, going to bed too early, getting up too early. He's just a mess. It is getting better, but his overnights are inconsistent. At least he's happy most of the time, which is more than I can say the week he was sick.
Diana gets the worst of Simon's sleep inconsistency, because during the week she gets up with him so I can squeeze out seven hours of sleep for work. The problem is that she doesn't nap when he does, sometimes because he ends up not napping for very long, and sometimes, because it's her only real shot at finding time for a shower. And then she has to keep up with Simon the rest of the day, which isn't really a one-person job. She's always tried.
I won't even acknowledge my own source of fatigue relative to Diana's, but it's there. Mine is mostly mental, as I feel like the world is beating me down. The most obvious part of that comes from thinking about my unfortunate house problem, but there's a ton of stuff I just get stuck thinking about endlessly. It seems to happen the most when it's time to sleep. I also think that I'm again dealing with seasonal affective disorder, as evidenced by the crazy mood swing I had going from Orlando back to home. The short days and gray skies are getting to me. I didn't seem to have it last year, perhaps because it was a more mild and less wet winter.
Alas, awareness is the first step toward fixing a problem, and we're going to figure out a way to turn those frowns upside down and get some Z's.
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