I felt really, really strange today. I've totally disengaged from everything I spent time caring about since July for some reason, and the only thing I can attribute it to is starting a new job. I can't really explain it.
As is the case with any new job, you can't get a feel for how things will be in the first week, and I suspect that's what's unsettling. When you work for yourself, even if it's not the windfall cash flow kind of work, at least you have a pretty good idea of how things are going.
Of course, I learned today that the other company that did not hire me just got a $20 million round of financing, which surprised the hell out of me for a company that isn't that big, and is already profitable. I don't know why that matters really, except that it's an interesting league to play in, and I don't get to play there.
My new boss said to me that it was likely I'd figure out something clever enough to make into a business plan some day, and that really stuck with me. I think working with him will train me to see those opportunities, which is something I'm not very good at. I tend to only get into things that truly interest me, which holds me back.
So at the end of the day, I think not feeling quite like my normal self comes out of the rush of feelings you have when you're transitioning into a new gig. That feeling is of course augmented by some lingering resentment toward my former employer, anxiety around financial goals and a strong desire to have everything in place for April.
Meanwhile, I've taken a strong interest in Silverlight and WPF.
Lego Batman is out this week... I think I might need the distraction!