The critical path of change

posted by Jeff | Sunday, December 15, 2013, 12:05 AM | comments: 0

You know how it is when we get to the end of the year. The change in calendar brings with it a flood of nostalgia and reflection. I keep thinking of things that seem recent, but they're fully a year or more behind us. Today we were talking about the day from one year ago, where we took Simon to a parent group outing at a fire station, had lunch at Red Robin, Diana got her nose pierced, and we did a little shopping at Target. I was crafting my resignation from Humana. Even in the midst of all that change, there was a ton more to come.

Change can be hard. It can be uncomfortable. We tend to devote a lot of energy toward resisting change. Even Simon, at the tender age of 3, tends to flip out when he's forced to adapt in a changing situation.

Adaptation, the way we deal with change, is also hard. What often sucks is that the world is going to change around us whether we like it or not. And yet, sometimes, people can't or won't change. I tend to think these are not the happiest of people.

That observation is largely built on my own experience. There were certain things in my life that I wanted to stay the same forever. When one of the most challenging changes happened, when I got divorced, I was forced to look at what change was possible.

There's something insanely freeing about giving in to change. You have ideas, values and goals, and they're important because they help make up who you are. Allowing those things to be malleable is akin to selling out, or some such nonsense. But in reality, what you're doing is embracing change on the strength of new input.

Dealing with change is another one of those cultural problems. Some people can't let go of racism. If a politician changes her mind, she's a pandering flip-flopper. You can't live on less because you're used to more.

This year brought unprecedented change for us. It was exciting, and we embraced it. Life's circumstances will change whether you like it or not. It's best to adopt change and roll with it.


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