A friend of mine was chatting with me about favorite music, and music that impacts you in significant ways in relation to significant events in your life. Of course we agreed that Def Leppard's Pyromania was one of the best albums of the 80's. No contest. Obviously.
But there are also songs that frame something in your life in a certain way. These aren't necessarily tunes that are universally popular, and maybe not even music you would ordinarily be into. Yet they find a way into your life and they stick with you. I have some favorites in a bigger context, mind you. "Sound" by James to this day challenges me to see the world and myself positively in it. "Shine" by Tracy Bonham reminds me to see the good and beauty in people that I love.
As one would expect, one of the most difficult things I've ever been through was divorce. The split itself was hard enough, but the reconciliation with the person was only half of the challenge. (In the end, we remain friends, something I'm eternally grateful for.) The other half of the challenge was learning to understand myself in the context of relationships, and how I derived my own value. In that case, the thing that got me through was Life For Rent, by Dido. To this day, it seems extraordinarily unlikely that I would find the album, let alone love it the way I did. I suppose I gave it a chance for a shallow reason, like thinking Dido is cute, adorable even, but I can't think of any series of compositions that tell relationship stories as well as that record. Starting with "White Flag," seemingly a refusal to give up, and ending on "See The Sun," a declaration of moving on, it's perfect. I spent a year at least listening to that a few times a week. The live version of "See The Sun" that she recorded at Brixton Academy in particular, which does not go out quietly, just stuck with me. The bridge is so perfect:
Do you remember telling me you'd found the sweetest thing of all
You said that one day of this was worth dying for
So be thankful you knew her at all
But it's no more
It was that sentiment that ultimately helped me out. The title track eventually made me realize that we have to make our own future.
Is it a bunch of sentimental crap? Maybe. I'd like to give Dido more credit than that. Music has a strange way of affecting me, despite declaring so much of it these days is garbage. (Except for Garbage, which is gold.) I'm thankful for music.
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