I've been really stressed out the last few weeks. A lot of it had to do with the final weeks and days of getting the financing done for the house. Some had to do with the issues, most of them minor, with the house construction. I've found myself frustrated and short with Simon, as his behavior has been difficult every few days and I'm not dealing with it in an effective manner. I think I'm also dreading the June end of my contract, not because I won't be able to find work, but because I kind of like what I'm doing and the people I work with.
All of that negative energy takes its toll. When I stop to gain a little perspective, I always realize that these are not really big problems, but I infrequently have that perspective in the moment. I've been trying to find a little peace, though I haven't really looked in any particular place for it. Today, it found me.
We were at the new house this evening, doing a little bit of work. I went out to the patio, which is currently inhabited by a couple of cheap camp chairs, and I sat down. It was the first time I really got a feel for the neighborhood noise, which is fairly natural most of the time. Then I heard the distant sound of a steam train whistle, obviously from Magic Kingdom.
My brain tripped like a scene from The Matrix, rushing me squarely in one of the deck chairs on the patio of a Lighthouse Point cottage, at Cedar Point. I could feel the breeze off of Sandusky Bay. I could almost see Mean Streak, and hear its trains climbing the lift. It was so rich and vivid of a memory, and it was filled with so many friends, lovers, wives and even my little boy. The sound of the CP&LE Railroad, as it turns out, connects me to my new home where I can hear the Walt Disney World Railroad.
It's so easy to get bogged down by life sometimes. While I'm often critical of people who are so tied to the past that they can't move forward, there's no question that memories and familiarity can provide great comfort. Today I got all of that from the sound of a train whistle. It makes me happy that I might hear it every day.