That damn this day in your life thing on Facebook is likely making me too nostalgic for my own good. It has been routinely reminding me of how small and cute Simon was just a few short years ago. It doesn't remind me of the diaper changing, the sleep deprivation, the difficulty communicating with him, the seemingly random vomit, etc. I do remember, however, thanks to blog posts, the anxiety about his development. He still has challenges, but things could have gone so poorly were it not for Diana's intervention, and the help of his therapists and teachers.
Today I had one of those days where I remembered more than usual, the changes in the evolving push-pull struggle of raising a child. I admit, I'm probably too hard on him at times when he struggles with things. I mean, food that's too hot (mac-n-cheese) or hard to crunch (a tough cookie) literally can cause him to meltdown, and I'm inclined to let him wallow in it. But then when he isn't feeling well, as he was today, I just baby the crap out of him. He's reached the point where he can independently shower, but today he wanted a bath, and he wanted me to come in with him and help. How do you say no?
I logically understand that he's not even 6, so he has a lot of years left of being a sweet, cuddle monkey kind of kid, but I already dread the idea that it won't last forever. On the other hand, he's at that age where all of this personality is developing, and it's funny, sweet and often silly. He's still excited to see me after work, and it never gets old.
I vaguely understood in his earliest years that they wouldn't last forever, but it seems like I was too damn tired all of the time to really appreciate it. Now that the feeding and ass wiping and bathing is a thing in the past, he's really at something of a golden age to need us and love us, but be more independent. I just wish I could slow it down a little.
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