It's remarkable how the holidays are supposed to be a time of joy and celebration, especially considering what they're based on, but yet so many people are so miserable or unhappy, ironically because of the expectation for the happiness and joy.
I was talking to a friend tonight that said, "It's just another couple of days. We could choose any other day." I think he's right in a lot of ways, but to even extend that thought, we could choose virtually any other day of the year to celebrate. In fact, it could be argued that we should celebrate things like love, relationships, our children, every day.
Human beings are incredibly resilient. Mother nature, evil and other forms of heartbreak knock us down all of the time, and usually, we get back up. The thing that we may find hard to admit is that we do it better with the help of other people. I've spent a great deal of the year understanding how to better take care of myself, but I've also come to grips with the idea that it's not a weakness to need the close company of people that you care about, and care about you. We're social animals.
So what do you do during the holidays when things aren't quite what you wish they would be? I think the first instinct is to be sad and depressed, but you have to fight through that and be thankful for the times you've had, and have a little faith that there will be more great times ahead. It really does soften the sting of loneliness and sadness a little.
As I posted earlier this week, Paula's Holiblog made a difference for me. Christmas has always been about friends and family to me...even though I hold all those people in my heart throughout the year, celebrating the season with them is a bit more special.
I recall feeling rather apathetic about Christmas for a year or two before Ian was born. But after he was born, seeing Christmas through the eyes of a child brought a renewal of the spirit. Even as Ian got older, he'd have this way of bringing that spirit back...like when I told him I was going to retire Moosey who hung above the fireplace wearing a Santa hat every year and he exclaimed "It's not Christmas without Moosey and his santa hat!" (Moosey now resides in his apartment).
Christmas is about traditions, old and new, with our friends and family. It's the one day when war is suspended, and the notes of "Silent Night" float through the air.
It's Charles Dickens' Christmas Carol and remembering those who are less fortunate than us. It's the Grinch realizing that even though all those Whos down in Whoville who had absolutely nothing, still gathering together singing and celebrating hand in hand.
When I find my spirit waning, these are the things I think about to help bring me back.