One of the many fascinating things about being with Simon is seeing him get excited. His inspiration varies from giant dogs, to walking, to Baby Einstein videos. I remember growing up, the excitement that came from things like Christmas morning, or arriving for that annual visit to an amusement park. Then in my professional life, I loved the rush of excitement from doing a location shoot.
What I've found, though, is that with time and experience comes a certain dulling of your "excitement senses." Things just don't excite you the way that they once did. It's a frightening realization, and I'm not sure what to do with it. I'm not sure what it means. Has the world become more dull? Have I become more dull? When I think about the last time I really had that tingly feeling, it was arriving at Universal with my new little family. Before that, it was in the hospital just before Simon was born. Before that, it was arriving in Hawaii. When I think about it like that, it seems like a long time to go between tingly excitement feelings.
So I ask myself, again, if it's the world being dull or me. I have to assume that it's some combination of the two. I think in the world of massive change associated with becoming a parent, I've definitely lost sight of what excites me. I haven't paid attention to what my itch is, let alone how to scratch it.
I long for that excitement, because it has been sorely lacking. I have to do a better job at making it happen, both in my personal life and in my professional life, or both when they can be combined.