Where did free time stuff go?

posted by Jeff | Wednesday, August 3, 2011, 7:31 PM | comments: 0

In the last three or four months, I've noticed that I'm simply not doing any of the things that I used to do with my free time. I would define that free time as the hours between when Simon goes to bed, around 7, and when I go to bed, around 11 or 12.

Prior to March or April, I would typically write some code, read, write, etc. Now, I just kind of do nothing. I feel exhausted and tired. Not physically, but mentally. As best I can tell, the only thing that has really changed is Simon's age. Maybe that really is the cause. Ever since he's become mobile, we can technically let him entertain himself to a large extent, but he can also come to you to play, and that's usually what he does.

For me at least, there's no opportunity to wind down and transition, and I think that's what's going on. When I get home from work, I immediately try to assume some Simon supervision, while Diana works on dinner. Then I follow that with his bath and such. Sometimes we eat with Simon, sometimes after he goes to bed.

The frustrating thing about this is that I truly do desire to do these "leisure time" things. I was pretty excited to get my forum app finished and open source. My screenplay ideas are there waiting in my head. I'd like to write more here, and I have a stack of things to read. But when the time presents itself, I just don't do any of this stuff.

I suppose awareness helps. I'm not going to punish or belittle myself. I accept that I've been indifferent toward doing fun things in the evening, and will do what I can to change it.


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